Sex!Life! - Relationships - Friends, lovers and mates

Friends, Lovers and Mates

Let's Talk About....Relationships

Relationships can be anything, and everything, from being new mates, to best friends to lifelong lovers. It can involve deep commitment, friendship, love and romance.

But what about sex?

Having a relationship can include sex, all types of sex. The main thing to remember is that when it comes to relationships and sex, it's important to only do things when you are comfortable and when you are ready.

But, everyone says something different!

Your friends say one thing, your parents another. Then there's your mates at school, your church, magazines and TV, your tribe or your neighbours.

If you are having sex because:

You feel you should
Everyone else is.

You are wrong - 50% of 18-year old Australians have had sex. So, if you aren't having sex you're in the same bunch as at least half of Australia's teenagers.

Love and Sex: Are They the Same?

Being in love can be extraordinary, wonderful, depressing, even frightening. And it can lead to a lot of pressure to have sex when you don't want to. Try talking to your partner. Maybe they feel under pressure too.

Talk about sex. Maybe there's something that you'd both like to try - and other stuff you want to maybe do when you've been together a bit longer.

On the other hand, it's OK to have sex if you don't love someone. It's OK to lust after someone, to think they're so delicious you can't wait to have sex with them. Just be sure that:

They feel the same way and don't feel pressured
You either use a condom or just do the fun, safe stuff like kissing, cuddling, massage and stroking.

Always Remember:

It's OK to take time to make decisions about relationships and sex
If you've had sex once and don't want it again, that's OK
If you've gone so far, but you change your mind and don't want sex, it's OK to say no. Don't feel guilty for changing your mind
If you're having sex, you have a right to enjoy it, to have it in private and to do it safely
13% of 16-18 year olds felt "worried", "used" or "guilty" after sex. Be part of the 77%, not the minority.